Category Archives: Dreams

I dreamed I had a little curly haired dog named Roxbury. He was Lindsay’s first but he ended up with me.

Before that there were a lot of random places and things in the dream like Josh F. being on stage and speaking at a rally about legal weed and reading something I sent him on the phone, it was like a wiki or something. He was kind of just reading it and then got to the last sentence and you could hear his voice get louder and more direct when he ended at “the time is now.” And everyone cheered.

Then I was somewhere else and saw KT with awesome short lavender hair grooming a dog. There were a few people there including Roo, and they asked some questions so I explained my title and what it should mean vs what I’ve been up to. They were all super friendly. Some lady came around and grabbed our plates.

I was running around this restaurant where my friends sat at a huge table. I went back to
The bar to try and figure out where their drinks were or who was supposed to bring them.

Turning around the corner I saw my Josh sitting by himself at a table and went back to find him but thought he was gone. Then I found him standing up from another table about to leave. I called out and wasn’t acknowledged. I pleaded and he just stared st me like he didn’t remember a thing, and I hugged him and begged him to stay. Come on baby. Come back to me. You can do this. I’m
right here. I won’t leave you. Please. I’m right here. Come back to me. You don’t have to do this alone… but you left.

And I wandered the property then walked down the steeet. I had acquired a vintage bicycle and then eventually the dog.

So I haven’t been remembering dreams after waking up even though I know I’ve been having them.

Funny enough, mom says she never dreams but happened to have one this morning and remembered. She had a dream she wasn’t pregnant and had fraternal twins, a boy and a girl. The were beautiful and the boy was a bit taller or bigger than the girl or something.

Well, there’s that.

Just woke up from a dream with a lot of weird stuff going early on. I vaguely remember walking around the sidewalk similar to the suburb I grew up in and was drinking some beverage in a large cup while texting Brandyn. Then I was going to find him but ended up in some other townhouse and couldn’t tell if it was one I was renting in some area I was visiting or if it was my parents Andy I was just temporarily visiting anyway. And this whole time it had been sunny pot but when I went back outside it was dark and there was some stand or food truck looking thing on a corner with a couple ladies standing around talking to neighbors.

They were some flavor of Christian or Catholic or something and we’re discussing mezcal, then some other plant, then the legality of it and then weed and even though it was legal per the state, she was adamant nothing was legal u til it was federal. That was her only argument. I remember biting part of an aloe vera plant for no reason, then thinking it was awful and walking across the steeet to throw it away in the trash can. I walked back other and saw a couple guys walk up to the stand / truck thing and apparently the nice ladies from earlier were selling some white powder I could only guess was cocaine which I found hilarious given the previous conversation with them. I walked around the truck stand thing and found a glass aquarium with a red striped snake in it with a huge head, and then it unlatched it’s jaw and ate something and I walked off.

I went inside this house and had gone back and forth and saw other people around. Some chick and I were talking sales strategies, and I’d been talking about visiting my coworkers in the AZ office and working there temporarily so I could visit friends. Then something came up where all of a sudden a Netflix subscription mattered or was a factor in trying to sell someone something… or some chick was explaining she needed that information but I didn’t see how it mattered or was related.

I went back and through a hall to my guest room and saw Liam. He wanted to make sure I was set and hugged me before he left. I went out to the room with the crowd again then back to the hall but found his room, and jumped on his bed to glomp him and get another hug before returning to my room but he pulled me in close and I didn’t want to get up since I was little spoon and miss tf out of that, and decided this was okay for a bit since it was just cuddling and we still had our clothes on. I didn’t want to jump into anything too fast and mess it up.. and was starting to fade for the night anyway. After I started drifting, he ran his hands down my arms, and since I was curled up, down my legs. I wanted to escalate things but decided against it. He was using the tv in front of us as a second monitor and was working on something on the screen but I gave no fucks cause I was so happy to be this close. And I woke up. Sigh.

I lost a lot of details since I’ve been up taking care of a couple things, but will try…

I was running around with these two chicks and one had a mean girls vibe going so I went full goth for this one (more attitude than attire) and then I was at home but it was nothing like home irl, the entryway was huge and very formal, Idk how else to describe it. I got into some confrontation with my parents and stormed out and it was pouring out, so I was walking around aimlessly at night, getting rained on.

And then ended up in some building that was partially under construction or renovation or Idk, and ended up being chased by someone and ran into Liam so we went up this flight of stairs to another part of the building that wasn’t done cause he knew about this ramp that was attached to the top of the stairs we could slide down (it was massive) and I did, and then I was outside and there were these guys working at this doc but they were in like swat gear and were all wtf, and then he came down the ramp and we ran. And then he mentioned having to go take care of something, and when I turned around he’d already left before I could hit on him. ._.

Had a dream the ex won the lottery when we were still dating then he ghosted me. Alarm went off, reset it and went back to sleep.

Also just hallucinated / dreamed my second alarm went off. It doesn’t go off for another 26 minutes .

I’m missing a lot of detail but am still remembering a few others of a dream I had earlier this morning, it’s weird.

I was on the second floor in a large house (it wasn’t new, had wooden rails along the second floor to the stairs, probably older than mid century… Idk… and Jay was there and was getting ready to go out.  So was someone else and me and that person were hanging out while I laid on the floor with the pets, and then there was a tiger in the room that chilled with us.  And then I was out and it was evening-ish, at some large venue and saw a bunch of friends hanging out in formal wear, Wifey, Violet, Jovi, many others.  I went inside the house (not sure if it was the same one) and saw more people hanging out inside, I went into a bedroom and Jay was there painting himself to look like Deadpool,  like it was going on as paint but dried looking like fabric material. And some chick came in with a six pack of something and then said something I can’t remember, left, then came right back. There was a brief exchange I couldn’t remember and he got up and left, and then he went after her and I think there was some misunderstanding, and I wanted to go clear it up so I followed.  Then asked some people sitting around if they saw where they went, then said “which way did the drama go?” They pointed out the glass door and I followed.

It was light outside, it was daytime and I saw some people hanging out but not them so I started walking to the lot and was adjusting my dress as I went.  It was white and fluffy, and I had some thing long shawl wrapped around me like ribbon, and got into the cube and decided to leave, but ith r o poke were in the way and I had to park it back in the dirt lot, and fought with the clutch and break, then moved the stick around to make sure it was in neutral, but successfully parked it.  And there was this group of guys parked in a car behind me, and hey asked me about some cake business across the street I knew nothing about.  Ram was with them, and we were inside some other house. It was rundown, these people were rude, some were dressed like punks. There was a knock at the door and I saw through the blinds two goth girls were there, probably to pick me up. One had purple dreads or falls (can’t remember), the other had purple and green I think? And I went down thto hall to use the bathroom before leaving and then Shelley was there to make sure I was alright but my stomach was wrecked and then I woke up. ._.

Just woke up from an awful dream. Sidney and a few others were there.  My assaulter from when I was 17 was there.  He was inserting himself into my life again and wouldn’t go away.  He tried to kill my  credibility in matters unrelated to the assault and was systematically meeting people in my social circle and was destroying my reputation. I had enough and said fine, let me talk about a situation in general and you tell me when you’d call it. I started describing generic truths and laid out facts to set the  stage, when I finally got to where I was about to ask the rhetorical “when is it okay to sneak into a room in the middle of the night and get on top of someone?” And had some follow up on how that’s not consent.  I was terrified, but too angry and hostile to back down.  I had that kamikaze, I’ll sacrifice myself and take you down with me, mentality to keep pushing, like I had nothing else to lose.  Things got chaotic around us and he took advantage of it, or he instigated it, I’m not sure, and the conversation degraded as people around us were distracted and he got up.

I went to the room he retreated into and started speaking truths he could not deny.  I called him out on everything he did to me and told him to leave and never come back.  He grabbed a laptop and clicked on some icon that launched a client that looked like it was connecting to vpn. He then showed me how he was spoofing me online. My name, the IP assigned to me, my professional profiles, my personal data, anything and everything people would use to interact with me online was there and it was an awful display of control.  He wanted to destroy me with it, whether that was by showing me or from actually using it.  And I was shocked, I didn’t know what to do.  He started talking about other things I couldn’t remember, then suggested I could drop everything and learn how he did it and how to dismantle it from him. I felt defeated.  I said fuck it, accepted scortched earth policy, burn everything in my life, let it go if I can’t stop anything myself and woke up shortly after.  I’m pissed off I didn’t  think of going to others for help in the dream.  Even if I don’t know how to do something, or guard against something, I probably know someone who does.

I feel sick.  I’m supposed to go to Disneyland tomorrow.

Had this awful mixed up dream with all this crazy stuff going on but the last part was this lady coming down with her guards or whoever behind her examining the group she captured.  We were sitting in a circle, and while we all looked human I don’t think everyone was.  She went around saying welcome and would touch their shoulder or knee as she did it.  When she got to mom she said welcome and touched her knee, then her calf really roughly and a couple other spots (her legs were elevated in some wheel chair bed thing, and the lady had some device in her hand and punctured mom’s left leg so deep.  She was hemorrhaging blood, the lady filled a cup with it and dumped it out, then somehow passed me because I was further back in the circle and kept going.  I was freaking out inside, how do I get her to a doctor, we need to leave now. And that’s when I woke up.  So nauseated.

From a nap:

I was walking up to this bridge in a neighborhood that looked like some pedestrian overpass and noticed some cop suv and wondered if I’d been spotted, then had the sudden feeling I was being chased like I was some replicant… but that’s a metaphor since those aren’t real, but I was being hunted for something and was ignorant on why.  I walked onto the bridge that was in poor shape a few feet ahead with broken white brick under concrete and about a two feet gap where you could see the road under it.  There was grass and other growth on and around it. I jumped across the gap and ran off the bridge as some of it crumbled behind me.  There was a police dog chasing me and I ran through a suburban neighborhood into a building that appeared to be large enough to be a high school?  I ran through the hall and looked behind to see the dog, looked behind again and saw the dog at it’s starting point when I’d gotten further and realized I was seeing decisions and movements seconds before they actually happened so I could adjust my path accordingly, and ran outside. I was in yoga pants and running shoes so that made it a bit easier, but also realized in the hall I was willing myself to go faster and started to question the outcome or if I was human.

I woke up in bed but the room was arranged differently where the bed was close to the wall with the door to the bathroom so there was space for a sitting area on the opposite wall,  got up and noticed the items on top of my dresser, walked into the bathroom and noticed some standing water in the tub, and went to the sink.  I walked back into the bedroom and stared at the mirror for a minute and moved it and started playing with myself.  My anatomy looked different in the dream, less compact.

I woke up in bed again in a darker room (suggesting it was night time) even though the first time was pretty dim too, and noticed my bed was in the center of the room with a tv on top of a stand to my right.  There was a controller next to me and when I grabbed it realized it was a wireless PS4 controller and I’d forgotten to turn the console off.  Got up, walked to the full length mirror on the corner, noticed something seemed off but wasn’t sure what, and walked to the opposite side of the room where the window was to look out.  I didn’t recognize the city, the buildings were huge and different, there were so many solar panels, and so many things on roofs that looked like capacitors, but they were larger than building AC units.  It was like living in some area where the topology was designed to look like a motherboard.  It was disorienting… I noticed the two large capacitors by my other window and got this uneasy feeling like.. what if those exploded?

I woke up in bed again in a room set up more like the previous one and laid in bed for a minute before getting up and sitting in a chair facing the mirror.

I woke up for the fourth time, and now I’m writing this out.

Woke up from this dream I was dealing with a couple coworkers from the east coast office and some storm was rolling in. The sky had that dramatic divide like when a haboob ones through and you can see where the blue sky disappears from the vertical wall or dust, only these were dark gray storm clouds.  I was in the car waiting for Andrew to get in and realized my backpack and a bunch of paperwork were in the passenger seat so I started to move everything to the back and when he opened the door, sat a box of assorted donut holes down, and helped. I grabbed a couple of glazed ones looking for a chocolate one and ate them, he grabbed the box and I was all waaaaait, and he asked if I was sure about that and I said yeah, I’d deal with the consequences, referencing the gluten. And I grabbed a chocolate one and devoured it.

I was sitting in the backseat and one of my coworkers from Scottsdale was in the drivers seat and I said to pull over since it was my car, and he did and I got out to take over but we stopped in this building we parked outside of.  It had wooden walls and a few coworkers from other companies were there.  I saw Todd and he seemed pretty out of it on the couch.  I looked out the window and watched the clouds.  A couple other guys came up to look and when I looked at the window again the clouds were mostly gone.

I went outside and most of my belongings were on this bench on the sand that was slowly ending up in water, or the tide was slowly rising so I was trying to gather everything quickly before the water rose too much. And it was taking too long so I pulled on the side of the bench towards me, it moved forward and I fell on the sand.  Then grabbed my bag.

Sabrina was going through this experimental surgery where she needed a small piece of my spine, like around my tailbone or maybe the very last vertebra, and I didn’t remember discussing prior but was going along with it. She’s been dealing with repeat surgeries irl life and is waiting on a third soon for a separate thing.  And he was prepping her and I asked if I’d be going under anesthesia and the doc made some quick comment like yeah, I guess we would switch you two out so you can go under. And he wheeled Sabrina out and I kept getting increasingly nervous as I laid on the hospital bed, and my spine hurt, so I sat up.  He’d already done something to it but I wasn’t sure if it was just a check or measurement.

My in dream assigned bf tried to talk me through and keep me calm, saying everything would be okay.  He’d gotten the doc to do a body mod for him and Idk when they even had time but there were inserts under where his eyebrows were to exaggerate them and make it seem like one large eyebrow and when I looked up again he went from normal to looking like a cyclops and I couldn’t look up after, and got nauseated, and looked up again and he still had two eyes but one was more pronounced than the other and with how his hair was covering one some of the time it kept up with the illusion.  I almost called out Futurama but left it and walked outside.

There were a bunch of scene peeps like there was an event going on and a lot of them were dressed up with the corset + ballgown skirt or fluffy skirt combo and falls. Dream assigned bf was normal again and looked a lot like Brendan which was weird.  We were chatting and it’s like I knew what he was about to say that he wished so I said if this were back home I’d have more pull to make the event happen but I wasn’t really connected here. And then a lot of the girls started coming back and seemed distraught, one chick who has the same name as me walked past and looked very upset, then went in some door to another room… but we were still outside?  Violet said she was going into shock.  It was weird, they all had performed in some burlesque like thing and a majority has been involved in the goth or fetish scene for a while, some have been in the sex industry, and whatever they all got back from doing killed them all a little inside.  I felt awful for them, but especially the one who walked away since this was her thing she usually took pride in. And dream assigned bf was all don’t feel sorry for her and started to nitpick at her, and I explained knowing her from back home, and this worrying me because of how I knew her.

We sat on a bench while more people walked by, mostly in steampunk attire, and this one lady with short light blue hair walked over and started enthusiastically talking to him without even addressing or acknowledging me, and that was annoying.  So I injected myself into the conversation , “hi!-“ And she was all “oh, we’ve met before,” so I responded “it’s so nice to see you again,” even though I didn’t remember her or know her name, and we exchanged some superficial pleasantries and she said something to me in Chinese and I was all, “oh I’m Korean,” and she was all ahh, smiled, and walked away with her older friend.

I realized we’d been out for a while now and mentioned getting back to check on Sabrina, and had been wondering how the extraction would go, and how would he yank it out or what care would he take to keep my spine intact. And then I mentioned, if he messed up, I’d be paralyzed after a certain point and wouldn’t be able to walk again.  I was walking very slowly up to the door back into the facility and felt awful cause I didn’t want to go through with it but felt obligated even though I didn’t remember a prior discussion before the doctors visit and didn’t give any prior ageeement, and woke up.

Just woke up from from a dream there was a mass shooting at work.

All the conversations leading up to it seemed so real too in some bits. I was in a small office surrendering access to an old system since my team moved to a new platform  and Eric happened to be there with a clipboard going over names of who still had access and by this point it was only our org anyway, and I made some joke to the lady behind the counter while making the submission (looked like hardware pickup in one of the buildings)  and then was outside some huge park in the evening and there were a bunch of us, like the holiday party but some
other event and I was talking about Chevelle and how I either just missed them in the area or am about to and need to see them and Eric just saw them at some music festival and I was all all sheee, and started talking jimmy eat world and other bands when someone started firing down the road and people started screaming.

We got up and left and I followed him and we started hearing machine guns, he started messing with this gate lock and we were in this grassy area, some oblivious guy in like a park ranger uniform was all what are you doing? And Eric explained something unrelated and he was all oh and we walked to the back where there was some deck, and patio furniture with umbrellas. And we sat down and I noticed other people there nonchalantly hanging around like nothing was going on, and there was a tv on but it was silent and I was looking at it to figure out the time and see if the news would come on cause I left my bag and phone when we were in a hurry and couldn’t call anyone or respond if anyone checked on me.

And woke up… right before 3:30 in the morning…

So sleep deprived lately…

We took an elevator that started to tumble, like it was not only falling but the way it was falling meant we were standing on the floor, then a wall, then what was the ceiling, etc, until it finally stopped.  We fell two floors and then the door opened and when I got out it immediately shut behind me and I started freaking out because you were still inside.  The ground floor opened up to a grocery store kind of like the WF here, but it was different, and I started yelling for help, then ran to an office where there were people and started explaining what was going on, and they were about to make a phone call when I turned around and saw light blue T-shirt at eye level, and looked up to see you were behind me in the doorway. And I was all, nevermind, he’s here!

And someone else in the room said something and addresed me and I came inside really quick to look at a board on the wall they were referencing.  Someone in there called me D.Va and I’d forgotten I was giving a fake name. Then I heard someone else call my real name and was all … and I walked out to find you outside by a red van and you were standing next to it waiting for me, wearing my Harajuku lovers hoodie and asking if I packed a change of shoes to go play since I was wearing slip on flats, and I was all yeah.  It was sunny out and we went to a park, you mentioned volleyball and I said that was bs for anyone over 6’ to suggest cause I’m hella small and you mentioned some Fitbit volleyball thing like Fitbit became the new Nintendo Wii or something. And after running around the park we were in some residence but Idk who it belonged to, and started setting up characters in a game that looked like Overwatch but not exactly. When I got further into setup I was by myself and forgot you were there and woke up.

Had a normalish dream where nobody died  for the first time in a while.  I was in the house I grew up in and was trying to sleep but the kid I was babysitting wanted to keep showing me things and play, and it was so early.  Which is funny cause it’s not even 6am yet and I’m typing this.  Finally she said she was hungry and I said she could fend for herself with breakfast and she made some dramatic statement and walked off.

I was thinking about what day it was and when my friend Shelley was going to visit me, then went downstairs to find Sky, my friends niece (the kid I was babysitting).  I started telling her about when my mom started telling me to fend for myself and start cooking and she didn’t want to hear it, and how it encourages variety and you didn’t have to be on anyone’s timeline.  G was there and walked out of the kitchen with this look that said “good luck” and I decided to take Sky grocery shopping in this really weird right hand drive white Mercedes with white leather seats and… like everything I’d never buy or drive, but I think it was a rental?

She started talking about how she wanted to grab those pre peeled and cut packs of vegetables cause she didn’t want to deal with all the prep and I said it wasn’t that hard, and some of my kitchen skills are potato quality but better than they used to be from repetition (omg).  And we were inside this huge store running through produce and I picked up a mango and was walking around with it in my hand.  We saw someone who was walking by that looked familiar and it was Dustin! And I was all wtf why isn’t he in SLC? And then saw you behind him and was all… ???

You both were in winter gear and when you both saw us decided to come up and say hello, and I decided to walk right up to Dustin and was all “hello!” And we all started talking and you gave me some awkward side hug and then Dustin asked how Dawn was doing and I said fine (my dream traded Sky for Dawn) and asked where you two went and he mentioned some crazy mountain hiking trip he decided to go on, and then you decided to do it to, and you both just got back from being gone for a while, and I was all… ahhhhh. And then I was mad you left for a long trip and didn’t warn me ahead of time, and started eating the mango in my hand, and then was all, we should get going to Dawn and we left, and I was driving the weird car and woke up.

My brain has decided dream you went on a long trip out of the US, and you forgot to tell me.  I’m not really sure this is the right way to cope brain.  You’re implying he’s coming back… I don’t think he’s coming back.  All because I’ve had some things implode and needed some time to get sorted.. I’m still trying to wrap my head around it that this was what did it.   Brain, thanks for trying anyway. *sigh*

In my dream I came to this realization my ex only recently started calling himself poly because even though he moved on and dated other women, he’s still in love with me. What a mind fuck.

Every dream with him is so stressful and I feel suffocated and trapped in them. And I know this came up because he showed up in my fb feed out of nowhere yesterday from a mutual friend.

I was just laying in bed trying to remember if I ever owned my own landline, and then heard someone break into my apartment, unzip my work backpack and start going through my things. I couldn’t move to get up and lock my bedroom door, and then just woke up for real. Wtf.

That was a scary dream. I wanted to get up and lock the door or grab anything and couldn’t move my arms.

Just had the weirdest dream I was hanging out with Sarah and this guy and then was in bed and my room was different, then I looked out my windows and it was dark outside and there was a pool and this place looked fancy (it’s a reoccurring place in my dreams), and then I was back in bed and heard steps up the stairs, a small knock at the door, and heard it crack open and then “hang in there.” And I said “dad?” And just woke up.

It doesn’t help my bedroom door is almost in the same spot in my room here that it is in Vegas, or was in the house I grew up in.

Omg, I just woke us from this dream there were two of you, it was so confusing, and I didn’t realize it until way later in the dream.  There was a sev1 outage our org had to deal with, this was at my current company.  You both had the same first and last name. One was at my current company, the other had just left our old company for the current one. So I know I had history with one of you, it was messy. You both knew me, liked me, I was aware of the one who moved over from SC. How were you both in the Bay Area and how were you not aware of each other’s existence? I started back tracking through internal IM logs and irc.

I was outside talking to a chick who had a lot of influence over everyone and took a lot of amusement in thinks that would break other people,  like stocks tanking, or other things that could cause uncertainty in corporate settings. She called everyone outside, and it was a strangely casual setting.  She had this outside furniture brought out where we sat with another one of her assistants, like resort chaise lounges and beds you see by pools. On the other side were these benches (bleachers?) and everyone started coming out and filling up the benches, it was evening, and for the first time I saw both of them on opposite sides of the area we were in.  The chick next to me was pretending this was  about that sev1 but was really making small talk with the crowd.  I was trying to match who I’d been talking to on IM, because the goddamn chat client we use only shows first and last name and you can’t see alias unless you look for it, and there were two of them so I started to panic and wonder of I’d ever started a conversation, and then given a response in a different tab… thinking the chat client glitched (it’s almost that shitty irl).  I remembered alias, then realized I could confirm one middle name, and wondered what was the other middle name. I realized Anna was playing them both, but knew she could only live full time with one, I mean how could she manage her time otherwise? I wanted to call her out to both of them. I knew I had an actual history with one, but had to let it go.  I would expose everything out into the open, let them sort it out, and walk away. And then I woke up.

Had a dream where I thought you ditched me at an event and I was running through a crowd to find you. You yelled my name from behind and were walking back from the parking lot, so I turned around and fell on the gravel on the bridge I was on. I stayed on my knees and ignored the gravel fucking up my stockings or heels, and just kept my arms over the bridge. It was small and stone and at a park or whatever. I waited for you to catch up to me and woke up.

When you called my name you said something like Really? And maybe something else but I can’t remember. But this whole thing started when I was laying on my bed in some weird room listening to brand new BoA, it was weird cause it was called 2008, and it was 2017. The artwork had a lot of green in it but it was different from Jewel Song. And I was looking out the window next to me cause whenever a train or something went by the building rocked back and forth. Eventually it fell, and kept falling a long time, I kept trying to estimate impact but couldn’t.

I woke up in a different bed from dogs jumping all over me, Dan decided to wake me and brought the neighbors dogs over, and Chibi. I was paralyzed for a moment and was finally able to move, so I called him an asshole and pushed him off the bed, and rolled over to go back to sleep. He grabbed a knife so I got up and grabbed a sword and pointed it at his neck while he sat in a computer chair. He kept antagonizing me and I realized this might be what he wanted. He couldn’t kill himself so he’d use me. Like when people were suicidal and would call the cops and then pull weapons and get shot. Idk. I backed off.

I was standing outside an entrance with you, and you were wearing a black shirt and jeans. I was in something gothy I can barely remember. We were chatting before walking in and we’re amused at going to a fetish ball. Making comments about chains and who would be tired to which but we didn’t have any and I was secretly relieved. You jokingly called me mistress and I said don’t do that again. We walked in and the event space was wrong. Then it started to look familiar and I realized it was a lot smaller than before, and it wasn’t the beautiful venue of Scottsdale. It looked more like a shittily coordinated SCA event, with a bunch of random people I didn’t know. I walked around to see if that was the entire event and decide if we should leave, or see if maybe there was something else somewhere else? I went around this hall and saw these tables lined up with all these cakes, and then around the corner from there was another open space with people in various costumes, and decided to walk back to where I was previously. I stood by a table and decided to eat a candy bar I’d brought with me, and this couple in matching blue and black vinyl outfits started talking to me. They admired my outfit which also had some blue in it. And while I ate and we chatted the guy asked me if the angry looking man over there was mine, and then I looked behind us by the cakes, I saw you shake your head and walk away. You were wearing a white button down shirt with your sleeves rolled up (dreams are weird, and sometimes emotional af). I was shocked by the reaction but didn’t care at the moment, so I ran in your direction and couldn’t find you, ran around the corner to where I saw those people in costumes earlier, and then back around and outside to where the bridge was, and that’s when you called me. I didn’t understand why you’d be angry at people talking to me, it didn’t seem to make sense. Why didn’t you just walk up to us and put your arms around me? But I was so upset at the whole thing all I could do was look down and wait, so I could hear you out and then address it.

On discovering Forevermore after waking up from a dream last Saturday… “it was kind of like waking up one morning to find someone wrote down your heart.”

I woke up from a stressful dream this morning involving looking at other apartments to switch into, going to MCC only it was a larger more chaotic campus, getting rear ended in Korean car, having trouble with left turns on a street at night with power steering gone and other trouble, no need to continue down this list or go into detail. I woke up and found something better in a text message.

I was running around with a group of people and they wanted to go somewhere where there was a pool to swim and I didn’t have a swimsuit with me so I was reluctant to go, and a chick in the group spoke up that she didn’t have one either. Then we’d realized most of us didn’t and I asked if there was somewhere we could go to buy some on the way and she mentioned a place that was hella pricy and then I suggested Forever 21 since it was cheap and this was a one time kinda thing. We ended up in some other place and I was sitting in a food court area, Brett and a couple other people were there. We had some weird interaction with some other group of people, and we were trying to figure out their rank (hierarchy in society), something was weird with them. I was driving at night and someone was driving north in the southbound turn lane and I had to avoid them. There was a car stopped at the light ahead of us and it turned out to be the people we were trying to figure out from before.

Then I was sitting inside somewhere with this fluffy cat and this lady who was a nurse was about to leave for work. There was a group of people sitting around on the couches by me discussing some awkward guy and what he was wearing. I chimed in giving hypothetical explanations why he might be wearing certain things or what devices he could have been hiding.

Had another dream I ended up in another dimension and met the me that belonged there, who was a trans man. He was a captain and was fighting in some rebellion, he had a pirates coat and seemed a little more black and white on decisions and dealing with people than I did, but then I realized it was a product of life experiences and differences.

There was a small dog running around the house I was in and then he had black and white paint streaked all over his back, and when I called it out and tried to grab him someone asked “does it look like this?” And held up a wet black and white painting that was now smeared, and it did. When I finally grabbed him he was smaller and rolled up like an armadillo, he was fidgety and mad I caught him, and I was trying to grab my phone but for some reason was using my sim in an older one cause I guess I didnt know where the new one was at the time? The animal I was holding with paint all over his fur was the size of a rat and peed in my hand out of retaliation, and then his handler showed up and grabbed him so I went to go clean up. Then I was at some political banquet thing where I saw Liam, but didn’t interact with him.

I was running around this event and then went outside and passed this lady who was walking in a judges gown, holding scrolls, and was yelling in protest. There was another girl walking my direction and she started to praise this woman’s efforts. As she walked past, the people would cheer and chant with her, but as she kept walking they’d remain silent again. It was like they were afraid of association unless everyone was involved, otherwise it was too risky. I wondered who she was or what would happen to her since she was brave enough to protest alone. I ran into the me from this reality again and he was focused on his own mission, and asked me if I wanted to make a quick buck. I thought he was just overly money motivated until I realized he was recruiting for some plot. I kept going back to this shower and standing under the hot water for comfort. I didn’t know how to get back to my reality and started to panic, then cry, and he hugged me and that was the first sign of compassion and empathy I’d seen from him. And then I woke up.

I had a dream Utada Hikaru was going on tour and tried to look up tickets.

I guess she just released Forevermore a few days ago too. And it’s the theme for a show called Gomen, Aishiteru… how appropriate.

Had this dream where a lot of weird stuff was going on. I was in space, in some compound and the gates looked like mesh, or metal, or like screen… I wasn’t sure how we were breathing and didn’t lose oxygen. There were a lot of workers being directed in different groups, and some other stuff I can’t remember. There was this one bit where a couple people and I were right outside this thing that was shaped like a shipping container, and I knew something was going to spark and start an explosion so I yelled for everyone to get inside, and when we did something went off and everything was spinning.

I was somewhere else and there was some confusion about my age, and then about this other girl who was late teens / early 20’s. She’d stopped aging completely, scientists couldn’t figure it out. I recorded video on my phone while she was interviewed by someone while doing random tasks like dishes, and you were there to observe, and she was absolutely fascinated by you even though everyone was there to see her. She was tall so I think it was seeing someone taller than her that got her attention.

We ended up in another area for the night and I was curled up in bed, facing the wall and reading some diagram that was posted to it. You were on the bed writing something, but held my right hand, and we were content. I think it was just the proximity. This is the most peaceful I’ve felt in a dream in a while.

Lamb’s Lullaby is stuck in my head.

Had a dream I was a teenager and my mom had just had another baby.  We were downstairs in the living room when I heard the printer turn on and heard dad yell it was an accidental print that was going to burn up a paper for half of some really large document and I yelled up the stairs “or you could just hit the cancel button!” And he didn’t respond so I told mom I’d go upstairs and do it, and she stopped my saying she’d deal with it.  Then she came downstairs with my baby sister and I was all, she’s so small! o.o. And then she brought the other one, she had twin daughters… and I was all omg, you had twins, grandma had twins before too? Omg.  They had hazel eyes like me but more green than brown, were wearing cute dresses, and had less hair than I expected.  Then one started to vomit what looked like acorn jelly color but was the consistency of syrup or honey all over her purple dress and I was freaking out yelling mom!!! While holding her up, and when mom went to grab a spit up rag for her, the other one started!

Before that my dream was doing some third person thing about this chick on a small spaceship that was sentient and had an arm in the center of the ship and had a camera on it.. and it had a laser with 360 degree aim at whatever.  It’s goal was destruction and the lady knew she’d be found so she stood up, introduced herself, and started to plead with it to change its mind.  She started talking about how everything’s okay and everyone gets lonely, but it doesn’t have to be anymore cause it’s got her and she kept rambling so it rerouted its course and headed for the sun.

I was also in some town in a beat up lumina and made a fb post looking for contraband and my friend Toby commented to keep him posted if I found it. Lol.  Can’t remember what it actually was though. :v

Had this weird AF dream I was walking around with a friend and idk if we were at a ren fair or something  else but we got to the end of a road and I wanted to get a closer look at a building so I went through the gate, and when I looked down from the bridge(?) I was standing on, saw a bunch of pigs in this dirt area below me and they were hella aggressive and off so I decided to turn around and go back to find my friend.

Allison and I went to grab food, and this guy (who I later realized looked like my old boss Tyler) kept coming around and was being super awkward (he was irl too!) and I can’t remember details, but later I was setup at a computer in another room with these rows of desks… that’s kind of similar to the setup I have going on now, and was chatting with Allison on I’m and he eventually came back and decided to set up at the desk across from me, which kind of surprised me and I was fine with it cause I wouldn’t have to look at him.  Which is funny, I remember he had really good hair, but was just awkward AF and had some interesting quirks omg.

I’m missing a lot of details from my dreams this morning, but the last bit I remember was being back  in Vegas and derping around the strip with Dan, and heading back to my room at the Bellagio and making out in the elevator.  I haven’t seen what the elevators or rooms look like there yet, lol