Monthly Archives: August 2017

Omg, I just woke us from this dream there were two of you, it was so confusing, and I didn’t realize it until way later in the dream.  There was a sev1 outage our org had to deal with, this was at my current company.  You both had the same first and last name. One was at my current company, the other had just left our old company for the current one. So I know I had history with one of you, it was messy. You both knew me, liked me, I was aware of the one who moved over from SC. How were you both in the Bay Area and how were you not aware of each other’s existence? I started back tracking through internal IM logs and irc.

I was outside talking to a chick who had a lot of influence over everyone and took a lot of amusement in thinks that would break other people,  like stocks tanking, or other things that could cause uncertainty in corporate settings. She called everyone outside, and it was a strangely casual setting.  She had this outside furniture brought out where we sat with another one of her assistants, like resort chaise lounges and beds you see by pools. On the other side were these benches (bleachers?) and everyone started coming out and filling up the benches, it was evening, and for the first time I saw both of them on opposite sides of the area we were in.  The chick next to me was pretending this was  about that sev1 but was really making small talk with the crowd.  I was trying to match who I’d been talking to on IM, because the goddamn chat client we use only shows first and last name and you can’t see alias unless you look for it, and there were two of them so I started to panic and wonder of I’d ever started a conversation, and then given a response in a different tab… thinking the chat client glitched (it’s almost that shitty irl).  I remembered alias, then realized I could confirm one middle name, and wondered what was the other middle name. I realized Anna was playing them both, but knew she could only live full time with one, I mean how could she manage her time otherwise? I wanted to call her out to both of them. I knew I had an actual history with one, but had to let it go.  I would expose everything out into the open, let them sort it out, and walk away. And then I woke up.

Had a dream where I thought you ditched me at an event and I was running through a crowd to find you. You yelled my name from behind and were walking back from the parking lot, so I turned around and fell on the gravel on the bridge I was on. I stayed on my knees and ignored the gravel fucking up my stockings or heels, and just kept my arms over the bridge. It was small and stone and at a park or whatever. I waited for you to catch up to me and woke up.

When you called my name you said something like Really? And maybe something else but I can’t remember. But this whole thing started when I was laying on my bed in some weird room listening to brand new BoA, it was weird cause it was called 2008, and it was 2017. The artwork had a lot of green in it but it was different from Jewel Song. And I was looking out the window next to me cause whenever a train or something went by the building rocked back and forth. Eventually it fell, and kept falling a long time, I kept trying to estimate impact but couldn’t.

I woke up in a different bed from dogs jumping all over me, Dan decided to wake me and brought the neighbors dogs over, and Chibi. I was paralyzed for a moment and was finally able to move, so I called him an asshole and pushed him off the bed, and rolled over to go back to sleep. He grabbed a knife so I got up and grabbed a sword and pointed it at his neck while he sat in a computer chair. He kept antagonizing me and I realized this might be what he wanted. He couldn’t kill himself so he’d use me. Like when people were suicidal and would call the cops and then pull weapons and get shot. Idk. I backed off.

I was standing outside an entrance with you, and you were wearing a black shirt and jeans. I was in something gothy I can barely remember. We were chatting before walking in and we’re amused at going to a fetish ball. Making comments about chains and who would be tired to which but we didn’t have any and I was secretly relieved. You jokingly called me mistress and I said don’t do that again. We walked in and the event space was wrong. Then it started to look familiar and I realized it was a lot smaller than before, and it wasn’t the beautiful venue of Scottsdale. It looked more like a shittily coordinated SCA event, with a bunch of random people I didn’t know. I walked around to see if that was the entire event and decide if we should leave, or see if maybe there was something else somewhere else? I went around this hall and saw these tables lined up with all these cakes, and then around the corner from there was another open space with people in various costumes, and decided to walk back to where I was previously. I stood by a table and decided to eat a candy bar I’d brought with me, and this couple in matching blue and black vinyl outfits started talking to me. They admired my outfit which also had some blue in it. And while I ate and we chatted the guy asked me if the angry looking man over there was mine, and then I looked behind us by the cakes, I saw you shake your head and walk away. You were wearing a white button down shirt with your sleeves rolled up (dreams are weird, and sometimes emotional af). I was shocked by the reaction but didn’t care at the moment, so I ran in your direction and couldn’t find you, ran around the corner to where I saw those people in costumes earlier, and then back around and outside to where the bridge was, and that’s when you called me. I didn’t understand why you’d be angry at people talking to me, it didn’t seem to make sense. Why didn’t you just walk up to us and put your arms around me? But I was so upset at the whole thing all I could do was look down and wait, so I could hear you out and then address it.

On discovering Forevermore after waking up from a dream last Saturday… “it was kind of like waking up one morning to find someone wrote down your heart.”

I woke up from a stressful dream this morning involving looking at other apartments to switch into, going to MCC only it was a larger more chaotic campus, getting rear ended in Korean car, having trouble with left turns on a street at night with power steering gone and other trouble, no need to continue down this list or go into detail. I woke up and found something better in a text message.

I was running around with a group of people and they wanted to go somewhere where there was a pool to swim and I didn’t have a swimsuit with me so I was reluctant to go, and a chick in the group spoke up that she didn’t have one either. Then we’d realized most of us didn’t and I asked if there was somewhere we could go to buy some on the way and she mentioned a place that was hella pricy and then I suggested Forever 21 since it was cheap and this was a one time kinda thing. We ended up in some other place and I was sitting in a food court area, Brett and a couple other people were there. We had some weird interaction with some other group of people, and we were trying to figure out their rank (hierarchy in society), something was weird with them. I was driving at night and someone was driving north in the southbound turn lane and I had to avoid them. There was a car stopped at the light ahead of us and it turned out to be the people we were trying to figure out from before.

Then I was sitting inside somewhere with this fluffy cat and this lady who was a nurse was about to leave for work. There was a group of people sitting around on the couches by me discussing some awkward guy and what he was wearing. I chimed in giving hypothetical explanations why he might be wearing certain things or what devices he could have been hiding.

Had another dream I ended up in another dimension and met the me that belonged there, who was a trans man. He was a captain and was fighting in some rebellion, he had a pirates coat and seemed a little more black and white on decisions and dealing with people than I did, but then I realized it was a product of life experiences and differences.

There was a small dog running around the house I was in and then he had black and white paint streaked all over his back, and when I called it out and tried to grab him someone asked “does it look like this?” And held up a wet black and white painting that was now smeared, and it did. When I finally grabbed him he was smaller and rolled up like an armadillo, he was fidgety and mad I caught him, and I was trying to grab my phone but for some reason was using my sim in an older one cause I guess I didnt know where the new one was at the time? The animal I was holding with paint all over his fur was the size of a rat and peed in my hand out of retaliation, and then his handler showed up and grabbed him so I went to go clean up. Then I was at some political banquet thing where I saw Liam, but didn’t interact with him.

I was running around this event and then went outside and passed this lady who was walking in a judges gown, holding scrolls, and was yelling in protest. There was another girl walking my direction and she started to praise this woman’s efforts. As she walked past, the people would cheer and chant with her, but as she kept walking they’d remain silent again. It was like they were afraid of association unless everyone was involved, otherwise it was too risky. I wondered who she was or what would happen to her since she was brave enough to protest alone. I ran into the me from this reality again and he was focused on his own mission, and asked me if I wanted to make a quick buck. I thought he was just overly money motivated until I realized he was recruiting for some plot. I kept going back to this shower and standing under the hot water for comfort. I didn’t know how to get back to my reality and started to panic, then cry, and he hugged me and that was the first sign of compassion and empathy I’d seen from him. And then I woke up.

I had a dream Utada Hikaru was going on tour and tried to look up tickets.

I guess she just released Forevermore a few days ago too. And it’s the theme for a show called Gomen, Aishiteru… how appropriate.