12:47AM

Idk why you’re sad.  I don’t know why you’re sad and want to be left alone, or why you were on the phone or who you were talking to or why.  I don’t ask even though I am curious because I know you usually prefer to not discuss these things.  Idk why you make things out to be alright on Instagram when I know you’re not okay.  I left you alone today… or yesterday now that it’s past midnight.  I tried to have a good day and distract myself, and give LA another shot.

I realized I’m happier exploring a city when the sun is still out, on my own time on my terms, alone or with friends. I enjoyed the goth scene a few years ago and met some great people, but I’ve collected the good and sifted out the bad.  It’s time to re-evaluate my expectations.  Idk if it was really great at that particular time in my life and I got lucky, or if nostalgia was blinding me.  My issues weren’t specific to this particular city, I mean LA has some issues but it has its good sides too,  and I found some of them today.

I’m rambling this wine drunk from Hollywood.  I’m an emotional wreck now that I’m alone again after running around all day.  I skipped the second night of the music fest for an observatory and a comedy club, which was worth it imo. And I’ll probably go back to the event that brought me here tomorrow cause I care more about the Sunday line up than tonight’s. But nothing’s set in stone, I want to drive up the coast and see the water, or go to little Tokyo, a friend has a shopping request so I’m sure I’ll get there at some point before I leave.  But I won’t worry about it and will decide tomorrow.

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