Monthly Archives: March 2016

Omg it’s early, it’s 6:19 and I’ve hit snooze like two or three times, idk why some weeks this is harder than others.  Anyway, I had a dream I was pregnant and things were chill. I was at the stage right before I’d typically start to feel the baby move but was experiencing pain and then worried this might have been an ectopic pregnancy and needed to check that out before the baby started moving so I didn’t die in case it was. Great way to bundle a lot of fear with joy  brain.

There was some dream before this one I barely remember having now, but I was chasing someone down like it was Repo Men and I got implanted with som organ against my will. I don’t remember the actual procedure or circumstance where that’d be necessary but it was an annoying chase dream. >_>

I didn’t sleep well last night at all, I haven’t really the last two nights.  I knew my mattress was kind of meh but didn’t realize how badly I needed to replace it until I woke up this morning and it’s felt like my pressure points are all bruised.. aaaaaaand now it’s at the top of my list.

Anyway, the bits I remember from waking up a bunch included having a 7-ish year old daughter with long black hair and bangs coming up to me with a black sweater or some other knitted thing in her hands because she was missing a button on her sleeve.  I was in a wheelchair and in hospital scrubs or pajamas, so not sure if this was a broken bone thing or a post surgical thing.  I told her that mommy isn’t really great at sewing things back, but that her grandma is really really good at it and if she caught her at the right time and asked, grandma could do it.  So dream me already pawned off sewing work to my dream mom.  *face palm*  I didn’t realize this until I woke up, that this little girl looked too Asian to be my daughter.  Like I know I don’t look as much like a mix to some people, or maybe because I’m used to my face I don’t think I look as Asian as some other peeps, idk… I can see I’m a mix, and I know my future kid could go anywhere from 25% – 75% Asian potentially, but this kid looked like 100%… I’m doing percentages here lol.  Well, my baby pics and little kid pics look super Asian so maybe my daughter will look super Asian too until she gets older and then she’ll look more like a hybrid.  Now I’m rambling on hypotheticals.

There was some other dream where a bunch of people were going to be in like the largest group photo ever and it was some Korean church or something.  I wanted to get mom up front with me and generally you get the shorter people up front but people were being assholes about moving seats and I was all seriously?  And you’re all church people?  It was very aggravating.

Then there was another dream about being on the wrong side of a fence and trying to get up to this concrete in between space after throwing a blanket over barbed wire failed.  I had to move these stacks of books and other things out of the way in this crawl space but there was this idea that once I jumped over I’d be leaving one time for another, and I can’t remember if I was jumping backwards or forward in time.

I had this dream last night that I followed you to SF.. on accident.  I was legit sitting up front wondering what I was doing on the plane and was worried, then looked behind and saw you a few rows back and sank into my seat.  I wanted to make sure things were alright and then sneak back off but the plane started moving and I was all omg I can’t make them stop the plane and cause a bigger delay,  I’ll have to suck it up and when I land in SFO buy the next ticket back to LAS.  So it definitely wasn’t romantic chase after you like in the movies, it wasn’t planned and in the dream I was like oh shit, this could almost come off as stalker creepy, shit the plane is moving, shit I didn’t get off on time.  And people were starting to get up and it was huge inside, people were grabbing food and stuff and putting them in these cute boutique boxes and I kept my head down just in case hoping I’d look like some other random small chick then thought well shit, I should have taken my lip jewelry out and dyed my hair black.. actually I never should have been on here, and I was in a red pajama tank and pants set so I knew my back tattoo was a giveaway. Shit.

I slumped on the floor but it was all nice and carpeted and the seats folded and I had blankets.  You came around and started calling me out saying you know it’s me so look up, and I looked away towards the seat/wall thingie and you were all fine and sat next to me and grabbed the x box controller next to my foot and waited, then said something like you know there are three of us, how is this supposed to work? And then I caved and responded all, well it’s okay cause when I get there I’ll hop right on another plane back to LAS and don’t worry about it and got silent and thought to myself omg I sound crazy, I shouldn’t be here and didn’t get off in time, I’m probably being compared to those stalker chicks and I know I was worried but wtf could I of done if something had happened like if there was a plane crash or other emergency, I would be in it too and I wouldn’t be able to stop anything, I wouldn’t be able to protect him from anything. Awkward af dream.

I don’t remember a lot of this dream other than Jeremy taking off since everyone was gone and it was late.  I asked him if he thought TEO would care if I took off early sine it was dead and he was all.. I don’t see why not?  So I tried to ping him and didn’t get a response after a few minutes and packaged up.  Then Jeremy was checking his phone and got a message and was all dude, TEO wants to keep you here, and I was all fuck and had to unpack quickly and dock down before anyone noticed I signed off for the night.

Beeka: ” Last night my dream involved me in a fencing match.  I blame Magi cause my stance was exactly like Alibaba. meh.”

Anne had a dream she picked up a dog bowl to feed her puppy and there were scorpions under it with two tails/ stingers and the only way to deter them was with vanilla extract.

._.

Today sucked.

I didn’t have much time when I woke up to note all this so here goes:

You were running a Japanese restaurant one day, like you were filling in for one of your relatives and your family owned it.  I guess you used to help out here on a regular basis years ago too.  I was sitting at a table on the floor, like on a bamboo mat thing, eating something and drinking wine. You had a couple girls on staff helping you out but I decided to go into the back and see if you still needed help since you were running around.  Even if it was minor things like dishes or running food or whatever, so it was like one less thing to deal with.  You came up around and I asked if I could assist with anything and you said yes but were non specific.

Later we were outside in the parking lot and my mom was there and other people were taking off.  She was asking you questions about something and you answered.  She said you were working too hard, and then she asked me if I was leaving with her or if I was sticking around and I said I was staying behind to assist.  I seasoned foods and you were cooking, three of the girls were up front since a large party had arrived but they only spoke Japanese and I had no idea what they were saying, but they kept addressing me since you were busy and I looked the most Asian out of everyone else who was available.  The other girls tried to help and I think at least two of them understood some Japanese.

“Had a nightmare for what felt like all night long about being extremely late for work. F***. That. S***. I hate stressful dreams! I’m not a morning person and there is horrible traffic on my commute, so I’m stressed about it almost every morning as I rush to to make it to work on time.”

There was a cute little orange and white tabby cat in my dream.  I had fallen asleep and woken up to it chillin by my open door, then it hopped in my bed and head booped me.  It had a black collar around it with a little box so I was guessing that was gps in case it got lost?  Idk.  It was weird.

The house I was in had an unusual layout too.  It was old, like I want to use the term antique but I know historical landmark would be more appropriate here.  My room was in the south west corner of the house and it was bright from the large windows.  The next room to the right had a few doors and the steps outside with the red metal screen door didn’t really make any sense.  There wasn’t a lot of furniture in there, and the next room over was the parlor.  Just north of my room on the SW side was another room I’d converted into another bedroom but it was originally supposed to be a pantry.  It was almost as large as the other room and they were almost connected by the large sliding door anyway, but the one that was converted had my Korean blanket and looked a lot more like my room in my last apartment.  I was sitting on that bed when I looked at the other room and noticed the bed in there had a brass frame like my mom’s.  So I wasn’t sure which one to use as the primary room given their location and in the house and what was in them.  To the right of this room was this large kitchen and open area, and kitty somehow ended upon the other side of the little black fence that was installed to keep him out, and he got to some food and was super happy about it.  I was trying to figure out how to give him access to more than one room while keeping him away from that area and had to go around and figure out which doors to leave open and which ones to keep locked.  I interacted with very few people in this dream and it was so minor I don’t feel like trying to remember it.

Just woke up with Three Days Grace’s Tell Me Why stuck in my head. Actually it keeps slipping between that song and Over And Over.

So in this dream I was “driving” Kat V home except we were both in the backseat of the car and Google was driving. It was like Google Maps for upgraded or something. Lol and it was daylight out and we were chatting when I was making a comment about how close we lived to each other, she said something about it not being that close and I think we were comparing different things so I mentioned how we were already at Arroyo. >_>

Anyway, the gps was acting weird and I thought I was gonna have to hop up front and take over manually, we came to a stop and I verbally reconfigured it to head for Kat’s house then told the garage door to open, the side of the building I was in front of opened like a garage door to another road. Weird! We kept driving and I noticed this asshole on the other side of the road driving the wrong way trying to catch up to us and make a right turn into the left hand turn lane going the wrong way again.. Then he was behind us and it was a taxi and the car was acting weird again so I told it to pull over and then I took over. It was dark out and we were driving what felt like south but I thought maybe I shoulda used gps and then it was pitch black.

I woke up in bed next to her wearing black boots and my gray fuzzy robe was over my head. Then I was in another room that was supposed to be my room / a storage room and there was furniture covering almost every inch of wall, in some areas all the way to the ceiling and it was a tall ceiling. The wall where the door was had the China cabinet, and the other wall to the side had the large wall unit my dad brought back from Turkey. There was a dresser near the door on the opposite wall from the wall unit and then other stuff.. a Korean trunk for linens and things. I wanted to relocate the mirror on the back wall up by the door so I didn’t have to go back and forth while getting ready. The bed near the window was on a platform and was pretty high up, and in the center was our old coffee table that also came from Turkey. I peeked inside of it and saw a tiny square CRT monitor, maybe 7×7 at a screen that I thought said Microsoft on it, and there was other equipment inside and a bunch of adapters and power cables inside. My first worry was ventilation and fire, the second was wondering how many years it had been running unnoticed, and the last was wtf was it broadcasting or what was its purpose. There was a little photo inside of a guy and it might have been some HID badge or something, and a little green sticker with some corporations name was laying inside the cabinet in the coffee table too. I shut the little door and went to look for my phone to snap photos and figure it out later and when I got back to the cabinet door with my phone, saw a little imposter phone chillin there in the same case and the phone was the same color but it was a different model and it was a tiny little thing and I thought wtf. So I opene the door again and saw a little projection on the left side of the wall inside, and it was coming from the littl screen to the right. The bottom still had the cables and stuff but now it was behind what looked like a little model of a shopping area with mall kiosks and advertisements. I took a photo of the screen label with what I thought had the corporations info on it I was looking for and of the badge from earlier, closed the door, and went downstairs to ask “mom” about it but she was some taller blonde lady behind the kitchen prepping a dinner thing for the other people that were sitting around the kitchen bar and the table. I pulled out my phone and said I wanted to ask her about “this” then showed her the picture and she was all ohh so you found it and smiled then went about her business like we might talk about it later.

Then I woke up and was trying to remember where we put the wall unit downstairs, then remembered it was so big we left it in AL. Never mind!

There were these two bunnies in a glass aquarium /crib like structure. One was a caramel color and the other had patches of different colors, black, brown, tan. They were a bonded pair and they were hanging out inside this glass case I couldn’t open. I called a locksmith to open it so we could rescue them and he asked me a couple questions I can’t remember. He then asked to see my degree and I said it was still in the mail from ASU. He said ahh and nodded like that would be typical of them and proceeded to open the glass case then left. And then I remembered I just completed a bachelor of science in psychology in the dream ahaha. That’s funny. Anyway, I picked the caramel bunny up first and held it close to my chest, then picked up the other one so it knew it was okay, since it was super nervous and shaky looking. I held them both next to each other like it was a little group hug and walked away from the glass case trying to figure out where their forever homes would be, if I should hit up a rescue, if they’d be placed together since they were a pair. And as I held them I just wanted to adopt them so bad even though I had restrictions and was trying to figure out how to introduce them while still having a back up for them just in case.

I was looking out my window in the house I grew up in but the other side of the carport looked different. There were buildings with balconies facing my window. They were painted colorfully with deep rich reds and some real accents. I thought that real looked much newer than the teal that had faded from my front door, and then realized it must have been where the doors were located and which one was getting sun bleached.. which made sense in the dream but both were facing north so no. Lol o walked around the corner and saw the fences neighbors had were removed and guessed they’d put them up without hoa approval, and now the hoa is enforcing stuff. The buildings were painted this sandy almost salmon color but lighter, it was weird.

Dad was driving and the windows were down. We were going down a windy grassy area and there were huge events on either side of the street. It was the super bowl and the stadium was on one side and this huge tailgate party was on the other. This neon yellow colored football came through and almost flew into the car. Dad tried to catch it but the guy sitting behind him messed with him, fucking it up, and he dropped it out of the car. It apparently came from the big game and dad was pissed. He hung his arms outside the open window against the car and I was all uhhh we’re gonna swerve into something and grabbed the steering wheel until he started driving again.

There was a huge group in this large singing hall with all these tables. I was sitting with my work friends and my parents were one table over, so I could bounce between parties. But they decided to move further down and were telling me to come with and I started to argue. I guess this was supposed to be the resort up on Mt Charelston? Idk.

All I remember is Mel making memes out of the photos of Nef and Jubee she posted on fb captioning them with the comments I’d left and with statements they had a fan. I was Nef’s fan on fb. Lol

I have no idea if I spelled Jubee’s name right. ._.

This morning I had a dream where a lot happened but a lot has happened today too that’s been emotionally and mentally draining so the bit of dream I can start at is where I’m sitting in the kitchen in the house I grew up in with a couple friends. I think Yvonne and Jorna, we were eating chicken talking about Costco and other stuff when I go outside in the yard. The gate door to the carport is facing west instead of south, and I had issues opening it due to some plastic or tape around it so I went through a hole in the side to see what was going on. After turning the corner I saw the clubhouse in the middle of the complex was on fire, some neighbors watched, some walked away. There was a fire crew but things seemed strangely calm. I didn’t see flames outside, just inside, and some smoke was coming from the top, but then I heard people screaming inside and that’s what freaked me out, and I ran away.

I went to my neighbors house and it was Karen’s (instead of Kim’s). I went to look for her and discovered Andrew was living there. He saw me through the crack of the door and ran inside. When I got in I asked someone standing at the counter if they knew where Karen was but they weren’t sure.  I wanted to find him and confront him about how he screwed me over because I wanted to know why he did it.  I also wanted to tell Karen what happened since she was in a similar position where he could fuck her over being her roommate.  I walked down the hall and decided to start opening doors but couldn’t find him.

That fire really bothered me more than anything when I woke up.  I mean it renewed some anger I have towards my former roommate, but the screaming and realizing people were burning to death was a terrible image/realization.