6:18am:
Been waking up non stop since 3am. Dreaming the weirdest stuff and can’t remember the previous one, but the one I just woke up from a designated friend and I were getting gas and snacks. She left to use the powder room and I was sitting at this table fighting my gaming laptop. It wouldn’t turn off, it was going to overheat. I got into a confrontation with some guy who was messing with our stuff.
Before that when we were driving around I was commenting on the architecture and other stuff. We drove past a lot and there was a drone landing, I wondered if it was doing touch and go exercises but it wasn’t. The chick who was with me said it sounded like it was the for me to leave, I asked what she meant and she repeated “I think it’s time for you to leave us and move on.” And I mentioned growing up in one desert and now living in another, and it’s weird cause I’ve been south and I’ve been east but have never seen the Atlantic ocean. There was a lot of anxiety for no reason. She said something about keeping in contact and we’d go on a road trip. But the context for leave us kept changing from leaving LV to just leaving, like it’s time for me to die.
And there was some other dream before that I can’t remember, I just woke up around 3 something again feeling like my heart was going to explode and feeling really sick. Woke up shaking a couple times after that. I’m not supposed to be awake if this happens dammit. I think today’s plans are sol.
8:04am:
This dream started off with me fighting a TV with a downloaded remote on my phone from Google play. Gave up and walked away. I was outside on a chaise lounge in this patio looking up at the neighbors balconies. The one next to the one next door was decorated with lanterns and paper flowers. I remember them having lunar new year decorations by their front door too. Someone was going around the yards taking meter readings so I decided to go inside thinking I’m not going to make any decisions regarding a house that’s not mine. I’m not even sure who I was visiting.
I was exhausted and went down the hall to the bedroom on the far left, and wrapped myself in the top blanket. The door opened and Edan (BB’s son) came in looking for something then a gf told him to go play somewhere else. While the door was open I noticed a group was sitting in the living room while you talked about some foreign soft drink and had some with you. I tilted my head and closed my eyes, someone shut the door.
I heard you say “give me a couple minutes” through the door and came into the room. You sat on the bed next to me, grabbed my hand and told me to release the tension I was holding on to, then you said “now we’re gonna do it my way.” And I squeezed your hand tight and it felt so warm, I could feel on my face that I cracked a little smile. I tried to open my eyes but couldn’t, all I could do was listen to your voice and feel your hand holding mine. You had to go back to dealing with the group and when I was able to open my eyes saw my friend sitting on the other bed.
I asked if someone were just in here and she said no but she’d been hallucinating some things since the new year and it was all just stress. We left and went to school, with Chibi from TBM and a couple other peeps, the escalators were all going down but we had to go up so we had to look for stairs. The ceilings were tall, the buildings were white and red and the windows were huge, letting a bunch of light in. We were walking past a Starbucks in the building and they had soo many pastries and these cute fruit tarts in chocolate shells so we waited to get some and then I realized I was topless AND my bag must have been upstairs so no fruit tart, my friend grabbed my boobs from behind to cover them and she suggested covering them in the dipping chocolate they used for the cake pops and chocolate shells and I was and no, that’s the worst idea ever, and woke up.