I had this horrible dream both my parents had died. I became so dysfunctional, I kept trying to call their cell phones, kept crying nonstop, felt bad when I saw my pet rabbit cause I promised my mom I’d take a picture of my boyfriend and I with the rabbit but they died before she ever saw that picture. I’m supposed to take that picture this weekend. I was hysterical, I was also wondering around the house I grew up in and moved out of in 2005. I couldn’t figure out how to get to the South, how to take care of loose ends, make sure they were okay and make funeral arrangements. I worried if they were both dead how did it happen, car accident? Violently? I woke up thinking, isn’t someone supposed to notify the next of kin?
Anyway, since waking up I don’t feel like I’m reactive or alert, like I’m watching a movie of my life go by.